A little over one hundred students attended the 2nd annual college fair at Durfee High Tuesday night. More than fifty schools were represented as well as the Army and Navy. Students frantically bumped shoulders, heading from one table to the next, gathering as much information as they could. Small schools and community colleges were a big hit, yet big schools like Boston University and Assumption college had few students interested. Many students unable to go to these schools mainly because they're too expensive.
Why have the smaller schools become more popular for Durfee students? The main issue seems to be cost, as many students told me many colleges were just financially out of reach. Durfee attendee Shannon Machado exclaims that her options are limited, "I don't have enough to go to schools like Boston University, or even UMass. It's tough for me to find a good, cheap school that has what I want. But you just have to hope for a scholarship, it's the only way".
The economic status is certainly a punch in the mouth to students who want a good education, but it's not the economy alone. Many students argue that many schools have always been too expensive, and thus are unable to get the education they want. Financial aid has been granted to many students in the area. According to Rhode Island Community college, most students have some form of finacial aid. Yet, a majority say it's still not enough.
Durfee students and Fall River students alike are finding it hard to get the money they need for college. Many have found comfort though, in community colleges. These schools are far cheaper than state or private schools, and offer good education. Massasoit Community College has confirmed that since 2001, the population has increased significantly with more students entering every year. Also, Rhode Island Community College has also reported a rise in students as well as BCC.
Community college seems to be a growing trend. Students Dennis Pacheco said, " I've looked around for a bit, and I noticed that the community colleges have the same courses and trades. But they're also a lot more accessible and convenient".
It's not an issue of career fields, or high standards. How can students become successful and make money if there's no money around? Most students of Durfee High agree that community college is the best option for those struggling to find money.
Even so, most students even at community colleges have some form of financial aid. If colleges are too expensive, then can the smaller schools solve the issue? And what will happen if these schools become packed? No matter what, we find many students struggling for money to pay for college. And many fear that they don't have enough.
Post Write
I think this piece is decent, I like the lead, I think it's clear and summarizes the problem well. The angle is pretty clear, focusing on the fact many schools have gone to community colleges and can't go to certain schools. I used quotations well, and I think I did a good job of picking and choosing what parts of the quotes I wanna use. I think it needs to be polished and presented in a better way, some paragraphs are really short, while some are much logner
Monday, October 26, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
News Paper Article
College Fair Fear?
Fall River Post
A little over a hundred students attended the 2nd annual college fair at Durfee High Tuesday night. Over fifty colleges and Universities were represented, and the U.S military including the Army and the Navy. Students frantically bumped shoudlers, heading from one table to the next. Even with hudnreds of students, many tables were left empty, why?
The main issue seems to be cost, as many students explained that many of the colleges were too expensive. Durfee student Shannon Machado exclaimed that her options were limited, “I don’t have enough money to go to schools like Boston College or even Umass. It’s really hard for me to find a good, cheap school that has what I want. But you just have to work hard and hope for a scholarship. It’s the only way”.
Is the economy effecting how many scholarships and how much financial aid is being distributed? According to Rhode Island Community College, most students in the area are relying on some form of financial aid or scholarship. Distribution of financial aid doesn’t seem to be an issue, but most students agree that what they’re getting as aid still isn’t enough.
Students in Fall River are finding it hard to get the money for college, what are they doing to get their education? Many students are taking semesters off to look for jobs as it’s the only source of money for them. As a result some have completely abandoned school and have joined the work force. But others have found economic comfort in community colleges. These schools are far cheaper, and atleast offer an education. Since 2001, many community colleges have reported an increase in students, two of the most significant being Massasoit Community College, and Rhode Island Community College.
When students were asked about community colleges, most agreed that these schools were on the top of their lists. Dennis Pacheco, student of Durfee said that community colelge is his only option. “I’ve been lookin’ around for a bit, and many of the community colleges here offer the same classes and trades at a more reasonable price. And these colleges are a lot more accessible and convienient”. These students have made it official, Bristol Community College is the new Yale.
According to students, it’s not an issue of career fields or standards being too high. How can students expect to become successful and make money when money is tight? How can they make money if they can’t get the education? These teenagers seem to agree that Community colelge is the best option.
Even so, most students at community colleges have some form of financial aid as well. So are these colleges, community or not, too expensive? And can these smaller schools solve the issue? Either way, we find many students in this area and other areas alike are finding it difficult to pay for college. And many fear they won’t have enough.
Post Write
I think my lead is pretty good, and my angles are good as well. I think they’re very clear. Are colleges too expensive? And can community colleges solve the issue? I think I used quotations well too. A problem I see is too much repetion of the words community college, and it’s local, but it’s also a nation wide problem.
Fall River Post
A little over a hundred students attended the 2nd annual college fair at Durfee High Tuesday night. Over fifty colleges and Universities were represented, and the U.S military including the Army and the Navy. Students frantically bumped shoudlers, heading from one table to the next. Even with hudnreds of students, many tables were left empty, why?
The main issue seems to be cost, as many students explained that many of the colleges were too expensive. Durfee student Shannon Machado exclaimed that her options were limited, “I don’t have enough money to go to schools like Boston College or even Umass. It’s really hard for me to find a good, cheap school that has what I want. But you just have to work hard and hope for a scholarship. It’s the only way”.
Is the economy effecting how many scholarships and how much financial aid is being distributed? According to Rhode Island Community College, most students in the area are relying on some form of financial aid or scholarship. Distribution of financial aid doesn’t seem to be an issue, but most students agree that what they’re getting as aid still isn’t enough.
Students in Fall River are finding it hard to get the money for college, what are they doing to get their education? Many students are taking semesters off to look for jobs as it’s the only source of money for them. As a result some have completely abandoned school and have joined the work force. But others have found economic comfort in community colleges. These schools are far cheaper, and atleast offer an education. Since 2001, many community colleges have reported an increase in students, two of the most significant being Massasoit Community College, and Rhode Island Community College.
When students were asked about community colleges, most agreed that these schools were on the top of their lists. Dennis Pacheco, student of Durfee said that community colelge is his only option. “I’ve been lookin’ around for a bit, and many of the community colleges here offer the same classes and trades at a more reasonable price. And these colleges are a lot more accessible and convienient”. These students have made it official, Bristol Community College is the new Yale.
According to students, it’s not an issue of career fields or standards being too high. How can students expect to become successful and make money when money is tight? How can they make money if they can’t get the education? These teenagers seem to agree that Community colelge is the best option.
Even so, most students at community colleges have some form of financial aid as well. So are these colleges, community or not, too expensive? And can these smaller schools solve the issue? Either way, we find many students in this area and other areas alike are finding it difficult to pay for college. And many fear they won’t have enough.
Post Write
I think my lead is pretty good, and my angles are good as well. I think they’re very clear. Are colleges too expensive? And can community colleges solve the issue? I think I used quotations well too. A problem I see is too much repetion of the words community college, and it’s local, but it’s also a nation wide problem.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Application Essay draft 2
Write an essay about something you have outgrown, or anything that has had an influence on you. What, if anything, has taken its place?
It wasn't a lot, really just a slab of leather. One of the only birthday gifts I had received that year, my first baseball glove. I wasn't huge on baseball, but I also wasn't huge on basketball, football, soccer or hockey either. It was really the only piece of sports equipment to my name, and my only gift. My aunt was an avid Yankees fan, always shouting for people like Bernie Williams and Paul O'Neil. I had no clue who these people were, but I knew they were the good guys. So I sat there anxiously with my new glove by my side, and cheered them on too.
Anytime my aunt would sit me down for a game, my mitt, like my companion, was always by my side. I often found my self tossing up a household item into my glove and shouting, "What an amazing catch by Jeter!". Number two was number one in my house. I had never really been interested before, but now that I had a glove I could actually enjoy watching the games. Wanting to be like Jeter, I went outside almost everyday and tried to throw baseballs as high as I could, and catch them as they came back down. My roof and gutters were quick to steal a number of my baseballs, and after my mom's constants complaints, I went to the park instead.
My father parks his car outside of Kennedy park as my friend Charlie and I climb out and eagerly step onto the diamond. Charlie was a decent hitter, he had played a lot more than me, so I went to center field where I assumed he would hit it. With everyone in position my father lobs the ball to the batter, Charlie. He lifs his front leg, then puts it back down and twists his hips swinging at the ball with his body and sends a shot to center field. As I begin to run, the ball starts its descent, and I decide to go for it. The leap of faith I called it; I caught the ball with the rim of my mitt and slid on the grass as it stained my glove. My father stood there, proud of me. I stood there, proud of myself. And Charlie stood there, angry because I had robbed his base hit.
The feeling was incredible, and I knew I wanted to feel it again. I kissed my glvoe, and went on with the day. "Old Faithful" was the nick name I had coined for my glove. For seven years I would play baseball with the only glove I had ever had. The padding had become non existent, so any ball I had stopped would make my hands sore. But I would gladly go home with a sore hand every day if I could make one amazing play with that glove. Way in the back of my head was always the thought that I needed a new glove. After all, this thing was dirty, a little small, and had a hole in the webbing. A fly ball could easily pierce through and crack me on the head.
I found myself at Olympia Sports, gazing up at the wall of gloves. One in particular, had caught my eye and didn't leave. An Easton, the stitching was very elaborate, and the leather I remember had a very strong scent. The light tan color looked incredibly smooth, and the dark brown interior was soft and comfortable. I figured since I was going to replace my first glove, I was going to buy the best one I could find. The glove was going to be needed to be broken in, so that's exactly what I did.
Baseball is a sport I love, and it truly makes me happy. When I step onto a baseball diamond, nothing and no one can bring me down. Nothing compares to the feeling of when I slip on my glove. I have outgrown my first glove, the thing that made me love the game. But I haven't outgrown the baseball diamond. I'll gladly continue to play ball.
Post Write
I think it's an OK piece of writing. I think it's better than the first draft, and the conclusion is good. I'm not too sure the subject will wow anyone, and I feel one of the body paragraphs is weak. The first two paragraphs I believe are well done. I believe I answered the question well though, and clearly answered the prompt.
It wasn't a lot, really just a slab of leather. One of the only birthday gifts I had received that year, my first baseball glove. I wasn't huge on baseball, but I also wasn't huge on basketball, football, soccer or hockey either. It was really the only piece of sports equipment to my name, and my only gift. My aunt was an avid Yankees fan, always shouting for people like Bernie Williams and Paul O'Neil. I had no clue who these people were, but I knew they were the good guys. So I sat there anxiously with my new glove by my side, and cheered them on too.
Anytime my aunt would sit me down for a game, my mitt, like my companion, was always by my side. I often found my self tossing up a household item into my glove and shouting, "What an amazing catch by Jeter!". Number two was number one in my house. I had never really been interested before, but now that I had a glove I could actually enjoy watching the games. Wanting to be like Jeter, I went outside almost everyday and tried to throw baseballs as high as I could, and catch them as they came back down. My roof and gutters were quick to steal a number of my baseballs, and after my mom's constants complaints, I went to the park instead.
My father parks his car outside of Kennedy park as my friend Charlie and I climb out and eagerly step onto the diamond. Charlie was a decent hitter, he had played a lot more than me, so I went to center field where I assumed he would hit it. With everyone in position my father lobs the ball to the batter, Charlie. He lifs his front leg, then puts it back down and twists his hips swinging at the ball with his body and sends a shot to center field. As I begin to run, the ball starts its descent, and I decide to go for it. The leap of faith I called it; I caught the ball with the rim of my mitt and slid on the grass as it stained my glove. My father stood there, proud of me. I stood there, proud of myself. And Charlie stood there, angry because I had robbed his base hit.
The feeling was incredible, and I knew I wanted to feel it again. I kissed my glvoe, and went on with the day. "Old Faithful" was the nick name I had coined for my glove. For seven years I would play baseball with the only glove I had ever had. The padding had become non existent, so any ball I had stopped would make my hands sore. But I would gladly go home with a sore hand every day if I could make one amazing play with that glove. Way in the back of my head was always the thought that I needed a new glove. After all, this thing was dirty, a little small, and had a hole in the webbing. A fly ball could easily pierce through and crack me on the head.
I found myself at Olympia Sports, gazing up at the wall of gloves. One in particular, had caught my eye and didn't leave. An Easton, the stitching was very elaborate, and the leather I remember had a very strong scent. The light tan color looked incredibly smooth, and the dark brown interior was soft and comfortable. I figured since I was going to replace my first glove, I was going to buy the best one I could find. The glove was going to be needed to be broken in, so that's exactly what I did.
Baseball is a sport I love, and it truly makes me happy. When I step onto a baseball diamond, nothing and no one can bring me down. Nothing compares to the feeling of when I slip on my glove. I have outgrown my first glove, the thing that made me love the game. But I haven't outgrown the baseball diamond. I'll gladly continue to play ball.
Post Write
I think it's an OK piece of writing. I think it's better than the first draft, and the conclusion is good. I'm not too sure the subject will wow anyone, and I feel one of the body paragraphs is weak. The first two paragraphs I believe are well done. I believe I answered the question well though, and clearly answered the prompt.
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